The Smugglers

To hear them tell it, faithful viewer, the “Doctor Who” writers’ favorite thing to do when writing a script is to include little references to the classic series. I had assumed until this point, however, that those references were simply limited to fleeting images of past companions or shout-outs to Sydney Newman and Verity Lambert. Never did I ever dream that a modern episode could be considered a chronological prequel to a classic episode. Believe it or not, though, that’s exactly what’s happened. This serial could be and has been construed as a sequel to the Matt Smith episode “The Curse of the Black Spot.” You remember, the one where Hugh Bonneville is a pirate who ends up on a spaceship and there’s a green ghost lady that’s killing off the crew? Turns out Hugh Bonneville’s character is none other than the famous pirate Henry Avery, and it’s his treasure that every cutthroat and smuggler is after in…well, “The Smugglers.” The most amusing thing about this turn of events is that, from the perspective of the characters in “The Smugglers,” Avery has died (therefore, his treasure is fair game), but as anyone who’s watched “The Curse of the Black Spot” knows, Avery isn’t dead. He’s on a spaceship with his kid and presumably trading with the crew of the Serenity. I love it when the show does something like this, I really do. Much like time itself, the chronology of “Doctor Who” really is a big ball of wibbley-wobbley, timey-whimey…you get the idea.

Aside from that cool little tidbit, I’m really starved for anything to write about. Nothing really happens this time around. There’s a few different groups of people, some genteel and some uncouth and all (apart from Our Heroes)  rogues, trying to get at Captain Avery’s pirate treasure. There’s double-crossing, double-bluffing, and double-edged swords by the barrelful, but unfortunately, nothing that warrants anything more than a brief “Oh? Ah?” at most. Even the occasional casual racism does little to prick my ears; it’s the seventeenth century, after all. Essentially, it all boils down to a bunch of people in period costume standing around in a quasi-urgent fashion. Not much of a season premiere, I must say.

Besides the fact that nothing remarkable happens, I was periodically irked by the fact that our new companion, Polly, was mistaken for a boy for the duration of the serial. Granted, she was wearing trousers, had her hair up, and her neckline was actually somewhere near her neck. None of those things, however, are excuses for mistaking the lovely doe-eyed Polly, with a voice like silver bells, for anything other than a woman. Lame.

I suppose I could talk about our new companions. They seem capable enough, both of them clever, determined, and brave. Polly’s idea of breaking out of jail by using fake witchcraft was particularly inspired. It was a little odd how quickly they took to the idea of time travel, however. Ben was resistant at first (though he seemed unfazed by the fact that the TARDIS had departed from London and landed on a Cornish beach), but Polly trusted the Doctor right from the get-go. The fact is, though, neither of them really got a chance to show much personality this time around. Granted, they were a bit too busy reacting to their new surroundings to spend some time introducing themselves to the audience. I do get the impression, however, that they care for each other a great deal. That makes sense, especially taking into account their adventures together in “The War Machines.” Well, let’s see what the future brings for them.

It’s nice to see that the Doctor has finally found his moral compass, too. I’m sure you remember, faithful viewer, how it took someone sabotaging the TARDIS to get the Doctor to actually stick around someplace and help. Truth be told, he was kind of a cold-hearted git back then. Nowadays, though (presumably because of the influence his human companions have had, or perhaps he’s just gotten used to the idea of being a hero), he’ll actually stick around and help out of the goodness of his heart. We have development, faithful viewer!

Oh, yeah! One last thing before I end transmission. The long-haired revenue man we encounter in this serial, Josiah Blake, is played by a man named John Ringham. We’ve seen him before, faithful viewer. Remember? Try to imagine him with paint all over his face and a few feathers in his hair. Got a guess? Come on! Okay, I’ll tell you: it’s the same fellow who played Tlotoxl the high priest in “The Aztecs!” Apparently he’s in another serial as well, which we’ll get to in the future. I guess it’s true what everyone says: there are only about fifteen British actors and they’ve all been on “Doctor Who” and in at least one of the Harry Potter films.

Stay tuned ’til next time, faithful viewer, where we journey to the Tenth Planet and the Doctor dies…or does he…